>>    


April 2024
your life is your life
don't let it be clubbed into dank submission.
be on the watch.
there are ways out.
there is a light somewhere.
it may not be much light but
it beats the darkness.
be on the watch.
the gods will offer you chances.
know them.
take them.
you can't beat death but
you can beat death in life, sometimes.
and the more often you learn to do it,
the more light there will be.
your life is your life.
know it while you have it.
you are marvelous
the gods wait to delight
in you.

The Laughing Heart by Charles Bukowski


>>    


March 2023
Been striviing to become one who, in the words of Oscar Wilde,
"could play gracefully with ideas"

- De Profundis ...written in 1897 while imprisoned for "gross indecency"


>>    


October 2022
Looking for meaning in responsibility
my mind overflows with activity...
I create a bulleted list to keep track of my life:

1) Construct a house on the Oregon Coast
2) Teach about rocks and dip my toe in university politics
3) Hold my teenage children's hands as we amble towards an ambiguous future
4) Give thanks to the Great Spirit


>>    


January 2022
"Your body is a vessel.
If you wait on it to do something,
there's no hope for you.
If you put your body to work,
you can start to live."
- Cai Chongda


>>    


December 2021
Popular things this year:
> crypto / nft
> stylish masks (covid)
> social media
> video games (somethings don't change)
> anti-racism, anti-colonialism, anti-fa
> craft beer
> family time
> camping
> streaming music (no ownership)
> a/c & air filters (heat waves & fires)
> squatters
> gender id
> michelin-rated food carts
> left vs. right, urban vs. rural


>>    


December 2019
I metamorphose into "old man"
As roots grow in place, deep and healthy
The ten thousand things jostle me
I dance, and recall that I am free.


>>    


July 2018
My balance is off... I stagger forward, drunk
Attempts to right myself are inept
Rare time alone = perspective
I want more!


>>    


February 2018
Years lose fidelity.
Like those who surround me, I am occupied...
a subtle yearning persists.


>>    


December 2017
Blazing from NOLA to PDX
with life-size Buddha in tow.
What could go wrong?


>>    


February 2016
A radio show takes form,
My way of settling into a new city.
Sage, Juno, and Bill Effin Murray provide support.


>>    


June 2015
House buying in Portland -
Enter the octagon.
I emerge bloody, but victorious.


>>    


October 2014
Novo trajeto
Nova ponte
Fresh air is key


>>    


July 2014
I have homes everywhere, many of which I have not seen
That is perhaps why I am restless.
Goodbye Houston


>>    


August 2012
Drink the wine that moves you
as a camel moves when it's been untied,
and is just ambling about.
- R


>>    


December 2011
Visiting the Pacific Northwest
clouds hang low and long.
For the first time since high school
I want to return.


>>    


June 2011
Body and soul have aged, another child is born
Trying to catch my breath
Don't think... feel


>>    


January 2011
"I've got kids, I've got a wife, we're stuck with each other for a while.
And suddenly there's an understanding that this is what life is -
it's actually the mess, it's the mud, it's the tangle.
It's not the clean, hygienic ... fireworks.
It's the little invisible novels that get written between two people every day of their lives."
- DM


>>    


December 2010
Degree in hand, I head south.
"The horizon leans forward,
offering you space to place new steps of change"


>>    


March 2010
Writing madly, trying to finish my studies.
I sit behind keyboard for long hours.
Sage provides diversion.


>>    


August 2009
At the airport in Бишкeк,
USAF cargo planes litter the tarmac.
Meanwhile, Urumqi China is paralyzed with strife.
In the mountains, I find solitude.


>>    


January 2009
Family holiday to Texas!
En route, we cover hills of leafless stubble.
The South welcomes us with mild weather...
Right place at the right time.


>>    


September 2008
baby baby baby baby baby baby
baby baby baby
baby baby baby baby


>>    


July 2008
Unripe mulberries are mildly hallucinogenic...
and they're all over our yard.
Back home, I tinker with house and trailer.


>>    


May 2008
At Irkeshtam Pass, the Chinese border closes for Golden Week.
Stuck between countries, I walk the hills for dayz.
Earth kindly accepts my baggage.


>>    


March 2008
I'm in Kashgar studying Uyghur.
The police restrict movement and instill fear.
I sympathize with the locals who know nothing else.


>>    


February 2008
Chinese New Years in Beijing.
Western New Years in Hanoi.
I get drunk and wander the streets.
My wife is pregnant.


>>    


December 2007
Vietnam is a country of contradiction.
Collatoral damage from the American war is ubiquitous.
Capitalism sprouts like a weed from the remains.
Communists get rich.


>>    


November 2007
Following the birds south for winter,
I slip into Laos.
The Mekong flows, massive and silent.


>>    


October 2007
I roll onto the Tibetan Plateau. It's vast and chilled.
Beijing controls by force, exhaling paranoia.
Monks are under quarantine in Lhasa.
I become sad and angry at something I don't understand.
I am escorted off the premises.


>>    


September 2007
Off to Burningman and then back to Rochester, NY.
It's nice to be home...
We watch movies in the park.
Life is fine.


>>    


July 2007
I'm in Bakersfield, the armpit of California.
The smell of oil wafts through this oven of a city.
We get rich off that shit.

I escape into the mountains with trailer and 2 cats in tow.


>>    


April 2007
We form the Concrete Discussion Group
and hold a "meeting" in Rochester's
abandoned subway tunnels.
Photos.


>>    


March 2007
The snow finally comes to upstate New York...
now, I'm ready for Spring.
Time is spent crafting our new/old house,
learning about the atmosphere + deep earth,
and mixing music.


>>    


September 2006
Skool in New York proves different
from life in the Chinese wilderness.
More than the environments themselves,
I enjoy flux.


>>    


August 2006
In a Kyrgyz family home on the Pamir Plateau,
I am detached from the familiar.
My body has become seasoned to the desert and fermented mare's milk.
Days are spent crawling solo across a harsh, striking landscape.
My own pent up shit is released to nature as god.
Respect to the nomads who live here.


>>    


July 2006
Angel & I bought a home!
It's mad ghetto... But, I see potential.
Check back in a year.


>>    


June 2006
The familiar smell of hot oil and pepper assaults my nostrils...
I have arrived in Yunnan, China to collect water and rock.
The Mekong proves long and deep.


>>    


April 2006
Wandering the New York countryside,
I happen upon a nuclear power plant.
Exploring the premises, I'm surrounded by
a troop of black FBI-style SUVs and told to leave.
I was hoping for a visitor's center...

Also went to Philly and bought massive speakers.
Time to sound my barbaric yawp!


>>    


March 2006
The West Coast draws me close and soothes.
Rare thunderstorms gather in Death Valley.
I am fortunate to be here now.


>>    


February 2006
Saw Prefuse 73 at a small dive in Buffalo, NY.
Shot a 1 minute video.


>>    


January 2006
Illicit gatherings in an abandoned subway.
The space is vast and textured.
Tracks of mineralized seepage coat the walls.
I turn on our speakers and
the underground fills with sound.


>>    


December 2005
Posted a chill-out mix inspired by clouds.
It's called Airen.


>>    


November 2005
Autumn hits New York like a fairy tale.
I'm too busy to breathe.
Leaves are scattered around me.


>>    


September 2005
I drove in slow motion across the country
to my new home in New York.
I am happy to make
its acquaintance.


>>    


July 2005
Wandering the vastness of China
with my wife, Angel Lee...
Wedding & Honeymoon


>>    


June 2005
I pack my belongings
and head off to Kaua'i to be married.
Polihale Beach lulls us to sleep.


>>    


May 2005
Took the Foreign Service Exam for fun.
Rawked a polaroid boof at 7feathers! casino.
Saw this sign on the way home.


>>    


April 2005
There is movement on the horizon.
I will attend University in Rochester, New York.
Summers will be spent studying Himalayan geology in China.
I am ready.


>>    


March 2005
My head is teeming with insect-like activity.
Stuff goes in and out.
I lose track...
Escape to Hart Mountain.


>>    


February 2005
A webspace is born.
John & Angel
will be married. Visit.


>>    


January 2005
A photo of me working the madness
known as Talk Radio.


>>    


December 2004
An open fire infuses my cabin with glow.
I don black.
 

>>    

October 2004
Small blots of text on the computer screen:
My monthly existence recorded for the masses.
I feel tiny.
 

>>    

September 2004
Flurries frost the siskiyous.
Autumn gets my attention by blowing
leaves all over my bronze '67 Plymouth Fury.
This car is my estilo.
 

>>    

August 2004
Gettin' my business on, I'm
immersed in two sectors: Design & Radio.
Spare moments are filled with
Burningman prep.
I'm stoked on playa!
 

>>    

July 2004
I escaped to the Oregon Coast
with my girlfriend. Wrapped in a
thick breeze of salty sea, I asked
Angel Lee to marry me!
 

>>    

June 2004
I remember that there are options...
to learn a game and try to become
the best player that has ever played,
winning many rounds and losing some too.
Or, to stop playing, stepping outside the
ring of competitors to marvel at the game
and players themselves.
 

>>    

May 2004
Headed out into the forest for oode,
thrown by nappie friends.
I welcome the time and space to
decompress and remember a time
when non-action was normal.
These days, my security
lies largly in completing tasks.
 

>>    

April 2004
My path is shrouded in unknown
circumstance. Ambiguous like the
Summer, which came on strong,
then receeded into folds of chilled rain.
Without doubt, in the coming months,
the Summer will emerge
radiant & clear... so shall I.
 

>>    

March 2004
I now live with two kitties.
They're very soft.
I just posted panoramas
taken through my travels.
Much time & energy has been
put into doing radio of various forms.
 

>>    

February 2004
Oregon is warming. I envy the
fabled Native American paradigm
because it seems intimately
connected with the Earth.
In my own life, my most
profound & satisfying experiences
have been close to the elements.
Nature as lover.
 

>>    

January 2004
My days are spent designing
webpages in Grants Pass, Oregon.
I live in a log cabin.
This smokey valley and its people
are blurred like watercolor.
 

>>    

December 2003
I stumble onto Mt. Ashland
as a snowboard instructor.
New Years in Oakland is long,
strange, and profound.
 

>>    

November 2003
My pace has quickened.
Cash comes and goes.
I'm working in
interesting & unexpected ways.
Check out my weekly radio show.
 

>>    

October 2003
I feel the seasons.
The air blows cool and dark.
Days are spent investing in
my righteous path.
 

>>    

August 2003
Breathing American air,
I feel disoriented.
I have connected with my
girlfriend in Ashland, Oregon.
Preparations for Burningman
are underway.
 

>>    

July 2003
I've settled in a small town
I like to call the Iowa of China.
It's interesting in that culture
flourishes here in the absence
of any aspirations to become Big Time.
This also happens to be a good place
to get skooled in Mandarin.
 

>>    

June 2003
After wandering solo through
the Chinese countryside,
I find myself in Shanghai...
Bladerunner-esque, multiplying
 

>>    

May 2003
As my hunt for work in
mainland China intensifies,
disease & reaction blows up in my face.
I have decided to stay in
Hong Kong a bit longer.
The future is uncertain... la la la.
 

>>    

April 2003
Arrived back in sickly HK
after spending a week in
war-jocked usOFa. The vibe is
depressed on both fronts.
 

>>    

February 2003
Started working for Apogee
in Hong Kong as a web designer.
Promises to be a fruitful experience...





    





RSS Feed of The Space